Pencils

I like pencils. I like to write in a book with a pencil, then I can carry the book around, I can take it to bed—whatever. Writing with a pencil is so much easier than typing on a computer. I hate typing on a computer. And I’m not a fast typist—I’m a couple-of-words-a-minute typist. If it wasn’t for the typing part of this blogging thing, I would put out a lot more posts. Plus, I like the smell and feel of paper, and I like pencils.

I used to love the smell of pencils at school. The teacher had on her desk a big pencil sharpener, and just the thought of going up to that desk and smelling all that shaved-up pencil—fantastic. Pencils are very sexy. I just love pencils. Pencils and hard-backed books of plain paper.

So, if any woman out there really wants to attract me, she just needs to get some pencil shavings, shave off her underarm hair and stick on pencil shavings instead! Dress like a teacher—with her hair up and glasses. And have a pencil sharpener. A large one.